I'm aware those that connect via AOL often have problems. Particularly if they use the AOL xtra service. AOL use a spyware program that isn't p2p sharing friendly. Also are you sure AOL doesn't have a firewall option? I thought I read somewhere it comes with Zone Alarm firewall or something.
I don't have windows XP so I can't give you a step by step guide. I can give you links to alternative instructions. 1. Setting Up WinXP Pro FireWall, or/ & this one 2. instructions for xp firewall #2
You have Norton antivirus. Are you sure you don't also have Norton Firewall? If yes, then this might be part of the issue. You should disable either XP or Norton's firewall. Norton would be a better firewall to use. Configuring Norton Internet Security
If you're connecting using DSL, then your computer is connected to a DSL modem right? What brand & model does it say on the unit?
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