Well lilikitty (Nicolette)
Cox, your ISP, has turned up in this forum before as being a particularly unfair provider, this thread:
http://www.gnutellaforums.com/genera...tp-prison.html, from November 2009 onwards, discusses the unfair treatment meted out by Cox to one of it's customers.
The thing is Cox maybe "bandwidth shaping", i.e. restricting, your P2P connection, while leaving your normal browser connection untouched, that would explain why the various P2P apps you have tried do not work.
Call your ISPs help desk and ask if they restrict P2P apps, they may deny it but some Internet research will turn up the truth.
UK Bob