I am saddened that so many educated people have been abandoned by the voice of reason. The presence of sex (the mere mention of the word causes me discomfort) in a person's mind can only mean one thing - the weakening of the human spirit and vastly increased susceptibility to sin.

Pornography is evil. Its debauchery leaves cracks in our will that will be penetrated by the voice of the devil. I myself have been forced to see a mass of this evil on Gnutella as, in order to fight one's enemy, one must get to know him - however painful and arduous this task might be. The box of tissues in my office is for hayfever. By the way, I don't suppose anyone would have the last five minutes of.....I was unable to sample the full extent of its immorality.....oh never mind.

Ahem...We must give a better example to future generations. We should lead them to follow the example of popular icon Edit whose chastity is a shining light in a sea of darkness. You can rest assured that her partner, Edit (another popular icon and companion to a future astronaut, no less), would not even consider placing his beloved's purity under threat. If only more of their peers would follow this excellent example and avoid the Siren call of sex and pornography - especially as so many have temptation so near in the form of a computer with internet connection.

So I bid you to join me in my quest to preach a message of morality to young people , especially to the slim, sweet , beautiful, teenage blondes of my neighbourhood as they, poor things, are the most vulnerable to moral corruption. I have even taken the trouble to avoid burdening my wife with knowlege of the ****** of this responsibility.

It is time for the American government to take the lead and begin a cybernetic war against the rogue service providers who allow this offensive data to pass through their systems. To march against them as if they were Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden rolled into one. In fact, I sincerely believe that much of the pornography on the net and P2P systems has been placed there by followers of Bin Laden in order to weaken the will of Western Civilisation, so this crusade could be legitimately undertaken in the interests of national security. The net must be cleansed at all cost!!!