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  #1 (permalink)  
Old March 3rd, 2002
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Default gnutella development plans

a few users in #gnutelladev on IRC have "developed a plan to make lots of money, purchase hawaii and live on there own seperate islands. the plan is as follows:

-first we will take the new program peeranha and bundle it with other programs. we will add limewire, bearshare, a windows xp demo, and all the extra crap and spyware that comes with them. this will give us lots of money as we will charge these people and companies to add there software.

-we will then create cd's and distrubute them all over. in time the production will be moved underneith of hawaii in the ocean in a secret production factory (oops i just said where it will be!)

-these cd's will be the sent out on the condition that they have a 30 day free trial period. after the 30 days, users will either be charged monthly or hourly for usage. there will be no way to shut the program down once it has been started, the on/off and reset buttons will no longer be functional on the computer.

-while using this nice little program, it will gather as much of your personal information as possible, it will then be either sold, or used against you. we will use it to black mail you if you are sharing illegal files

Now to the more exciting parts to this plan: the islands will be seperated amoung us.
there will be one in the shape of a "P"
one filled with pizza, milk, beer, and many tall green plants.
one with an airport, a harbour... and a big house! as well as a pizza cook.
my island will be full of nachos, and, like the rest, full of many many girls.

We will move about using a sumbarine train that is in retro japanese animee style, of course. with an transparent pipe below the ocean, on the sea floor. We will all have lots and lots of coffee, at all hours of the day and night, and for one members sake, all the coffee makers will have a timer that will automatically brew in the morning before i get up

on the main island, wich is in the shape of a big "G", we will host our webserver which has a own toplevel domain of course: .gnutella. with the new domain we will silenty gaine all copyrights on the name of Gnutella, lawayers will then fight for blatant licence fees for everyone claiming to have a Gnutella client or using the Gnutella protocol... which of course then becames our property. oh before I forget, all your code belongs to us!

hope to see your money and personally information soon.

Btw, Vinnie we are waiting on your check, could you speed it up please?

Last edited by Iamnacho; March 3rd, 2002 at 05:15 PM.
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Old March 3rd, 2002
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Talking

We see us on Hawaii Iamnacho!

Aloha,

Morgwen
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Old March 3rd, 2002
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Hi Morgwen, yes we will see each other.... By the way,

I have bought my hawaian shirt have you?

I hope to see some grass skirts soon too
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Old March 3rd, 2002
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hehe...

I hired my pizza cook already...

Morgwen
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Old March 4th, 2002
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hmm, you have a cook now, i guess it is time to start working on the business part of the deal and then on to finding the nachos, coffee, pizza ingredients....well and... girls of course

Vinnie, we are still waiting for you check, perhaps I will go check my mailbox again
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Old March 4th, 2002
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We also need to force the installation of the following items:

- Bonzi Buddy
- New.Net
- ClickTillUWin

Then, when the user's network settings are messed up, provide technical support for $75.00 per call. On the first call you tell them to buy a new modem. On the third call you tell them to uninstall the DUN, and forget to tell them to re-install it afterwards. On the fourth call you tell them to format the harddisk and re-install the latest version of their OS, which you can provide to them at an additional cost, plus $45.00 next day S&H. On the fifth call you tell them you shipped the wrong OS and you'll send the correct one if they return it first - if they don't return it first, you need their credit card information (which you can hand over to your wife or girlfriend's trust), if they do send it back, you forget to make a note of it and never send them the correct OS. On the sixth call you tell them you'll sue the user because of the use foul language. On the seventh call, you tell the user you've got enough money now and will see him on Hawaii.

Last edited by cultiv8r; March 4th, 2002 at 11:46 AM.
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Old March 6th, 2002
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Quote:
Originally posted by cultiv8r
Then, when the user's network settings are messed up, provide technical support for $75.00 per call. On the first call you tell them to buy a new modem. On the third call you tell them to uninstall the DUN, and forget to tell them to re-install it afterwards. On the fourth call you tell them to format the harddisk and re-install the latest version of their OS, which you can provide to them at an additional cost, plus $45.00 next day S&H. On the fifth call you tell them you shipped the wrong OS and you'll send the correct one if they return it first - if they don't return it first, you need their credit card information (which you can hand over to your wife or girlfriend's trust), if they do send it back, you forget to make a note of it and never send them the correct OS. On the sixth call you tell them you'll sue the user because of the use foul language. On the seventh call, you tell the user you've got enough money now and will see him on Hawaii.
Sounds like something tech support told some of my less nerdy friends. I usually know more than tech support. All tech support ever tells you to do is format your hard drive, and buy more stuff from them.
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Old March 8th, 2002
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it has come to my attention that i still have not recieved our first payment check... i think that it will be time to send some of the members of this group to begin collecting.

So soon i believe that the members (myself, Morgwen, Moak, and Phantom) will begin collections in person very soon... hehe

a few more notes: moak wants two small islands one in the shape of an "M" and one as the shape of a shark, and morg wants bombs to shape the islands as well as a satellite equiped with lasers which will do the same. and have no fear, we will monitor Morgwen so he does not go crazy with them !

Last edited by Iamnacho; March 8th, 2002 at 08:57 PM.
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Old March 8th, 2002
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yea, you remember what happend to the network last time some company CEO forgot to pay their bills!
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Old March 8th, 2002
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Hi,

I would like to sign up as the island Pizza cook, my references are:
http://developer.pirate.de/archive/p..._with_moak.jpg

Aloha and greets to the ladies, Chefcook
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