How many files are you sharing? If there is a decent number, and other people want them, then others will be trying to make sure they can connect to you. That's what is meant by uploads helping your connections.

In order for your searches to reach other computers, you have to have stable connections to the network. So, when you start up LimeWire, LW will try to connect directly to the last know hosts of your old downloads. If they reject you because they are busy or offline, then LW has to send out a new search through the regular network. If the regular network ultrapeers aren't accepting your searches, you have to wait until LW can find an ultrapeer willing to accept your connections. Thus the "waiting for stable connections" message.

Most people only allow three uploads at a time from one person. So if the files you want are all coming from the same person, they will only allow you three at a time and reject your other requests.

Sounds like you have a pretty pathetic connection much of the time.

The best thing you can do is search these forums for "accept incoming."

If your setup can accept incoming connections, you are properly set up as best you can. After that, it's a matter of leaving LW running for long periods of time so that your connections get better and better.